Saturday, August 01, 2015

'The god Of Choosing' By Mark Anthony Osuchukwu

"I knew it was going to be a bumpy ride. it was already dark when the commuter Hiace bus was set to move, I sat close to the window directly behind the driver’s seat. The driver was a gleeful fellow who made mockery of everything he saw. First, he began with the woman whose vest was made from a green banner.
When she walked up to him to purchase the ticket, she wore a half-done smile on her face strutting confidently towards him. Mr. Driver said ‘madam the madam! This una church no dey let una rest oo. Na so so travel ‘. She replied him with a smile of disgust as she snatched the ticket from his right hand hurriedly as if he was about spewing another thing against her church.

Thirty minutes after our departure, her voice killed the silence the passengers enjoyed. ‘Praise the lord’ she hollered, expecting an energetic ‘hallelujah’. She was disappointed as the reply was a scanty and lousy ‘halelu’. She began a sermon, the bus was dead silent, and her voice was the only voice that was heard as we snaked through shrubs and big trees. When she saw that she was her own audience, she quickly rounded off the prayer that was embellished with several rounds of binding and casting the evil one. she bound up imaginary devils and threw them into an ocean, she snatched the passengers from the hands of the evil one, she prayed for a safe journey, she spoke in thorns, she prayed for the driver, she asked her god to forgive the driver from what she described as ‘blasphemy against the god of choosing’

As soon as she was about rounding off her prayers, our lip muscles garnered muscles from where I don’t know to spit an emphatic ‘amen’ that will free us from the bondage of her prayers. After the lord’s prayer, we chorused ‘hey-MEN’. Our driver had engaged himself in a verbal conversation on the phone for a long time. He spoke a language that only the men in front understood. When the headlamp of uncoming vehicles flashes on our windscreen, I saw them nod and nudge themselves in anticipation. I tried to understand the language but it was like making faces at a blind man. I noticed a reduction in the acceleration of the vehicle, I was alert, within seconds, the vehicle pulled over, men emerged from the pitch-black forest armed to the tooth. My heart beat began doing what it knew to do best in times like that. It was beating plethoricaly. I searched for our journeys deliverer to invoke her god to bind the living day light out of these men of the underworld. I couldn’t see her but I felt she was the one who slipped herself under the seats as she was pygmish. I said in my heart ‘let me hear her bind anything after this robbery session’ we were beaten, my face added serious weight, my eyes were blood clot, I was dizzy. In my dizziness, I noticed how the men in front were not bordered by the thieves, our deliverer too. It was hell on earth. ‘It is an organized robbery’ I muttered. After the beating and robbery session, we were pushed into our bus, they helped us slide the door to lock, one of them walked to the driver’s side and whispered in their language, Mr. driver pointed to ‘preacher woman’ behind me. The well built man strutted towards the window with a confidence that is seen on thieves only. He gave her something. I do not know what exactly what, by the way, I was half-blinded with the punches that brutally caressed my eyes during the travelling recess.
Next thing, the engine revved, the speakers started pulsating with a familiar beat, the song began ‘I don get alert…’ our driver replied with a fulfilling voice ‘godwin’. I wasn’t sure of what was going on, I asked myself if I was shooting a movie or if we agreed to be robbed and battered. Before we got to our destination, our ‘preacher woman’ said ‘when I tell you of my own god, you mock me and laugh’
‘the god of choosing has saved me and let you people to be subjected to brutal beatings of your fellow human’ I thought in my heart ‘oh, you are an affiliate robber who used choosing as a mask ehn’ I was boiling, fury swallowed me up.
She was among the men who subjected us to their beatings and now she is opening her mouth upandan ranting choosing choosing! She was a prayer warrior thief I said.
This is the way people are robbed in church these days. Not with a gun this time but with a bible!
.This is a new month! Dont be robbed by these hungry boys who turn themselves to pastors within one week.

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